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Humor Joke 幽默笑話

中國日報網英語點津為您精選語言地道的英語笑話，開心學英語。

Three baths a day

2006-12-06 08:51
Brown: I'm sorry to see you so unwell. Have you seen the doctor?
Smith: Yes, I'm having three baths a day.

2006-12-06 08:49
The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled .

His father knew it, but his grandma doted on him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum.

Not speaking to me

2006-12-04 08:43
A man sat at a bar, had the saddest hangdog expression.

The score comes under the influence

2006-11-30 08:50
Once upon a time ,a stupid guy went to the doctor's.

Wife's picture

2006-11-22 08:19
A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks.

I'm the boss

2006-11-21 08:00
The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.

In a second

2006-11-20 08:00
A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?"

I wasn't asleep

2006-11-16 08:27
When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"

We are the best of friends

2006-11-16 08:26
The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said, "Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will."

Kiss

2006-11-13 08:00
At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word "KISS" scribbled on it.

Three guys bet

2006-11-12 08:00
Three guys were in a bar and they were all pretty smashed. The first guy said, "I bet that if I had one more beer, I could fly!"

A wild guess

2006-11-11 14:54
Our physics professor was struggling to draw the class into discussion of Archimedes's principle of water displacement.

A talk on the phone

2006-11-10 08:43
I teach computer course, and my students often call me at home with questions.

Day after Day

2006-11-09 08:44
A teacher was always so involved in the text being studied that he never looked up. He would call on a student for translation and explanation, and-without realizing it-he often chose the same student day after day. Out of respect, the student wouldn't point out to him.

What went wrong

2006-11-08 08:43
A Japanese company and an American company had a boat race, the Japanese won by a mile.

A Call from a frog

2006-11-07 08:00
A frog telephones the Physic Hotline and is told, "You're going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything of you." The frog says: "This is great. Will I meet her at a party, or what?"

I wasn't asleep

2006-11-06 08:00
When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"

We are the best of friends

2006-11-05 08:00

They are directly from America

2006-11-05 08:00
Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from hervisit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her.

Kiss

2006-11-03 08:00
At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word "KISS" scribbled on it.

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